"Bedside Manner" -- Icing on the Cake or Vital Component?

I think I've been guilty of trying to convince myself that a physician's personality, social skills, capability for empathy, etc should have little, if any, bearing on my opinion of his or her "skills".  But dadgummit....I think I'm changing my mind. 

Scott had a routine post-op appointment with his surgeon this morning.  I've mentioned that his pain level remains to be higher than it did with the first lymph node surgery last month, most likely due to nerve damage in the region.  I can tell that he's beginning to fear that the pain has come down as much as it's going to, and it's with this in mind that he headed to the follow-up appt this morning.  We already knew that this particular doctor had a quiet, introverted demeanor, so neither of us would ever expect an answer to a question in anything but a very matter-of-fact, unemotional manner.  However, when Scott addressed the topic he'd been dreading to ask (whether or not he could expect any more relief of pain with time), it was as if Scott had asked the doctor about his preference in "baked" vs. "regular" Ruffles potato chips.  A dismissive shrug of the shoulders, lack of eye contact, and an answer of "Could be.  Some days are good...some bad.  You'll get used to it."

Patients walk out of appointments like that lacking something very important -- hope.  Doctors certainly don't need to lie to patients, imparting false hope, but a simple addition of some eye contact, compassion for how an answer might impact a patient's mindset....these are small things that don't require much time or energy and can have huge pay-offs.

Let's don't forget (and I'm thinking of myself in my mothering and spousing) how much power is in our words and gestures.  Use that power today to let someone know they are precious and important to you!

Promise? :)